Category Archives: Sports

Manchester United v. Liverpool – English Premier League, 2011 – Live Tweetstream

I never understood why soccer players have to formally shake hands before a match. I know it promotes sportsmanship and respect, but let’s face it, most players don’t need to … Continue reading

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Chelsea v. Manchester United – English Premier League, 2011 – Live Tweetstream

Stamford Bridge has a been a very, very, very fine house for Chelsea for the better part of a decade. Especially when Manchester United has come to town. Since 2002, … Continue reading

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Suit Fights State Ban of Mixed Martial Arts

You usually don’t associate sports with the First Amendment. The UFC hopes the courts will do what the NY legislature has failed to do, thus far. On a personal note, … Continue reading

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Amputee Sprinter Ruled Ineligible for Olympics

From the Archives: I wrote this satirical piece in January 2008 after reading about Oscar Pistorius, a sprinter who was deemed ineligible because his prosthetic legs gave him an unfair … Continue reading

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Pirates Impressed with Crystal, Sign Comedian to Multi-Year Contract

From the Archives: I wrote this satirical piece in March 2008 after the Yankees signed Billy Crystal and played him in a spring training game against the Pirates. I remembered … Continue reading

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Tom Jackson Shoots Chris Berman

From the Archives: I wrote this satirical piece in December 2007, back when I was writing for a website that was kind of like Onion Sports Network – only we … Continue reading

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Manchester City v. Manchester United – English Premier League, 2011 – Live Tweetstream

I really don’t want to talk about this game anymore. In fact, I would rather: 10. Watch Liverpool’s DVD where they somehow justify using the phrase “Treble” for winning three … Continue reading

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Liverpool v. Manchester United – English Premier League, 2011 – Live Tweetstream

Manchester United were flying to start the season, but have come back to earth a bit after two draws against Stoke City and in the Champions League against Basel, as … Continue reading

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Manchester United v. Manchester City – F.A. Community Shield, 2011 – Live Tweetstream

The Community Shield may be glorified friendly, but there won’t be any fuzzy feelings when the red and blue sides of Manchester clash. Last year, the Red Devils won their … Continue reading

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Federal Judge Rules Cuban Can’t Use “Unclean Hands” Defense in SEC Case

The end of the Summer of Cuban? Hardly…

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